Oh No
SO WHAT IS DAVE LIKE WHEN HE HASN'T SLEPT AND HAS BEEN WRITING PAPERS FOR A WEEK AND A HALF?
1) HE WRITES IN ALL CAPS.
2) HE JUST WANTS TO BE DONE WITH S-109. HE HATES THAT CLASS SO FUCKING MUCH HE CAN'T EXPRESS IT IN WORDS OR EVEN GESTURES. HE'S LISTENING TO DAVID BOWIE.
3) Okay, this all caps thing is stupid and I have to go to the bathroom.
4) If I turn my head really quickly to the side there's a ghost image that follows.
5) I bought this cinnamon raisin toast the other day and I'm convinced our kitchen smells like it ALL THE TIME, and it pisses me off, except, why? I like the smell! At first I smell it and I get mad, but then it smells good and I just don't understand my anger.
6) There's this carwash in Madison, Wisconsin with a sign that's a green octopus holding buckets and sponges, and it's like, why am I talking about that?
7) The other day on New York Times.com one of the most emailed articles was a recipe was for macaroni and cheese. What is that?! It wasn't even a good recipe. The results were, I mean the ingredients were just like milk and noodles and a lot of cheddar cheese. Albert, remember when we made homemade mac&cheese in xox one random night, and maybe Masha was there I don't know, and then Nick Hollon came down and had some, actually, maybe he didn't have some, I think maybe he wouldn't have some for some reason. Nick Hollon, are you reading this you bastard?!?! DID YOU HAVE SOME?????
8) Speaking of macaroni and cheese, before I left for break I was drunk and hungry one night so I made some Annie's shells and cheddar, except we didn't have any milk, so I just used extra butter, and it was gross, so don't try that.
9) God now all I can think about is Nick Hollon and that weird squinty thing he does with one eye when he talks sometimes.
10) Sometimes people say the exact wrong thing to you without even knowing it, and it's when that happens that I feel completely alone.
11) I think the music I was listening to suddenly changed sad, so that's what prompted that last thing. It's Ella Fitzgerald.
12) I was trying to think of possible hybrid animals earlier and I came up with Iguanameleon, and then I kept trying to turn it into the punchline of a joke where it would be a pun on "one-in-a-million," you know like "how many times will it succeed if you try to cross two lizards?" "Iguanameleon!" but clearly it doesn't work.
13) I need to either work on my paper or give up and go to sleep
1) HE WRITES IN ALL CAPS.
2) HE JUST WANTS TO BE DONE WITH S-109. HE HATES THAT CLASS SO FUCKING MUCH HE CAN'T EXPRESS IT IN WORDS OR EVEN GESTURES. HE'S LISTENING TO DAVID BOWIE.
3) Okay, this all caps thing is stupid and I have to go to the bathroom.
4) If I turn my head really quickly to the side there's a ghost image that follows.
5) I bought this cinnamon raisin toast the other day and I'm convinced our kitchen smells like it ALL THE TIME, and it pisses me off, except, why? I like the smell! At first I smell it and I get mad, but then it smells good and I just don't understand my anger.
6) There's this carwash in Madison, Wisconsin with a sign that's a green octopus holding buckets and sponges, and it's like, why am I talking about that?
7) The other day on New York Times.com one of the most emailed articles was a recipe was for macaroni and cheese. What is that?! It wasn't even a good recipe. The results were, I mean the ingredients were just like milk and noodles and a lot of cheddar cheese. Albert, remember when we made homemade mac&cheese in xox one random night, and maybe Masha was there I don't know, and then Nick Hollon came down and had some, actually, maybe he didn't have some, I think maybe he wouldn't have some for some reason. Nick Hollon, are you reading this you bastard?!?! DID YOU HAVE SOME?????
8) Speaking of macaroni and cheese, before I left for break I was drunk and hungry one night so I made some Annie's shells and cheddar, except we didn't have any milk, so I just used extra butter, and it was gross, so don't try that.
9) God now all I can think about is Nick Hollon and that weird squinty thing he does with one eye when he talks sometimes.
10) Sometimes people say the exact wrong thing to you without even knowing it, and it's when that happens that I feel completely alone.
11) I think the music I was listening to suddenly changed sad, so that's what prompted that last thing. It's Ella Fitzgerald.
12) I was trying to think of possible hybrid animals earlier and I came up with Iguanameleon, and then I kept trying to turn it into the punchline of a joke where it would be a pun on "one-in-a-million," you know like "how many times will it succeed if you try to cross two lizards?" "Iguanameleon!" but clearly it doesn't work.
13) I need to either work on my paper or give up and go to sleep
posted by DB at 5:18 AM
0 Comments:
Post a Comment
<< Home